i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
