two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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