I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Randomize
