I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
