so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
