he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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