Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
