yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Someone came in the potted fern
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
