Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
