Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize