I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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