haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize