I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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