Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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