If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
you didnt know i had herpes?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
