apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Randomize
