Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
