the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
He did a backflip because drugs
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
