i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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