Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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