Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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