i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
How many fucks given?
0.12846
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