I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
