Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
