Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
