shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
