and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
