I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
