Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Never underestimate the power of titties
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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