Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize