i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Never underestimate the power of titties
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
