does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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