THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Randomize
