no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
