spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Shame is for Republicans.
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