You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
