then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
