let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
It's never too late to be topless.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize