halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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