my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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