my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Randomize