I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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