just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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