I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
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