Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Randomize