I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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