That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
