so explain again why im purple
no
I want to make a zoo with you.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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