last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
