4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Randomize
